When to Hold 'Em, When to Fold 'Em

The Topic:  The New York Times has contacted you to write for their advice column under the pseudonym, Ms. Serensky.  A female reader writes in with the following problem: "My boyfriend wants to break up, but I do not."  What advice do you give the person? Write your response to the reader using a formal paragraph for your "Dear Ms. Serensky" column.  (Thanks to Lauren Lang for this topic!)

Dear "Standing My Ground,"

While I admire your steadfast determination to keep a claim to what you see as "rightly yours," you must keep in mind that young men do not appreciate monikers likening them to property.  I can empathize with your frustrations in terms of the time you have spent "making him a better man."  While many women, past and present, can understand your unwillingness to let go of a man you have so carefully molded, you must indeed do just that.  Let.  Him.  Go.  Do you really want a boyfriend who does not choose you?  Do you really want to spend your time with someone who would rather spend his time elsewhere?  Do you want to put in even more hours trying to prove why he should stay with you, knowing that he does not want that?  I should hope not!  A young lady with your propensity for enhancing the inadequacies of the opposite gender should, as they say, "take your talents elsewhere." To state it plainly: forget about this young man immediately.  Sure, you will face some heartache, some bitterness, and some anger.  Sure, you may find yourself fantasizing about damaging his personal property, taking a bat to his truck, etc.  Sure, you will feel the sting of rejection when you see him carouse around town with his new prospects.  But, keep in mind: a woman alone feels less pain than a woman with a boyfriend who resents her.   I implore you to not fight this fight.  Do not present yourself to the world as a groveling, lovelorn, pathetic woman who needs a man by her side, no matter what the cost.  Bid him adieu, and move on.  Ultimately, I bet he will become "a flabby failure who sits whimpering in his basement."  Think about the satisfaction you will feel then!

Sincerely,
Ms. Serensky
Dispenser of Wisdom